As from the time I could walk and talk, all I ever wanted to do was martial arts. My family believed this was due to my love for the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle & Power Rangers. I have been involved in martial arts since the age of 4. As a child I competed in judo and found out very quickly I enjoyed competition. At age 10 I changed to taekwondo, where I quickly learned taekwondo was an Olympic Sport. From the time I padded up and threw my first kick, I knew that this was where I was meant to be and where I wanted to succeed in.
Before I came out, I struggled to find examples of out LGBTQ athletes. It wasn’t really a common thing.
These days I am completely out of the closet. After years of being told that who I was and the way I looked and presented myself was wrong, I made the decision a couple of years ago, to be out and to be visible to my sporting community and to never be ashamed of who I am. Today I am part of a club and team who loves and supports me unconditionally.
I came out to my sporting club at 17, after I was confronted and asked by my coach not very long after coming out to my family. At the time, I saw my coach as an older brother/father type figure whom I trusted, so I did not deny my sexuality to him when he asked. At first he seemed completely fine and accepting, however soon after I did come out, the news spread like wild fire to other members of our club. My teammates found out and they were completely fine with it. Unfortunately, I soon became the pit of every joke made by my coach, bullying and belittling me, when making “gay jokes” in the middle of class on a regular basis in front of the class.
Nowadays, my current coach and taekwondo club are in full support of me and other LGBTQ people, which motivates me to continue to strive to be the best athlete that I can be. With a supportive coach like mine, it’s easy to have an open and transparent athlete-coach relationship and friendship, which means she is able to help to bring out the best in me. I feel such a sense of pride when representing my club in the ring.
I soon became the pit of every joke made by my coach, bullying and belittling me, when making “gay jokes” in the middle of class on a regular basis in front of the class.
Taekwondo is a strange sport: you compete individually in the ring, but you train together in a team. You laugh, sweat, cry and bleed together, you fight individually, but you commiserate your losses and celebrate your wins together as one team. So I’m not sure that there really is a difference between individual sports and group sports when it comes to coming out, or that one is easier than the other. I think coming out is never an easy process, in any situation whatsoever.
Before I came out, I struggled to find examples of out LGBTQ athletes. It wasn’t really a common thing. As a 17-year-old looking to come out, I mainly looked up to people in the public spotlight who were comfortable in their skin and who I thought were awesome athletes anyway. I think gradually we are seeing a positive change towards LGBTQ athletes in sport worldwide, with an increasing number of major sporting leagues around the world signing anti-homophobia agreements and more and more high profile professional athletes not being afraid to come out and be proud!
My advice to others is that you don’t have to be afraid to live an authentic life while pursuing your sporting goals and dreams. You are not alone on this journey. Everyone has the right to participate in sport in a safe and inclusive environment as their true authentic self.